Im My Hummingbird Era
photo by Amy Thompson
hey girlie,
so the past few weeks,
I have been buzzing
through my everydays
like a hummingbird sticking its beak
into its most favorite flower pots
brimming with nectar—
lifting weights
teaching yoga
writing barfing its way out of me
and onto the pages
I feel like a bit of a live wire,
and in the best of ways
I’m being generous with my ideas
I’m not just getting cosmic downloads and keeping them to myself
the Universe is using me as a channel for others
I’m picking up the phone
and sending voice memos
to my nearest and dearest
big crazy wild ideas I have to preface with
you can say no
and
tell me if I’m wrong
…
I’m telling my girlies to write their books,
or aproach that special person,
and they are saying to me back
oh wow, I needed to hear that
I say to her
this was so obvious
it was staring me in the face
you should write a book about x
publish a post on y
start a podcast about z
she thought she needed permission
to do all that
turns out she doesn’t
why do I feel so good?
new workout? nope
new skin care regimen? definitely not
(it’s called exposure to natural sunlight, duh)
new diet?
or the ultimate hack
for masterminding my time
and “optimizing” each day?
is it turning 40?
(not necessarily, but on the heels of everything
we’ve mentioned so far,
this one feels like it’s starting to get warmer)
more on that later
I’ll let you know when I get there
(to 40, that is)
back to the part
all about being a hummingbird buzzing
its way around the garden to all its favorite flowers
dipping in its beak
and sipping deeply
and spreading the good news
about life
about everything
to all her inner circle bestie hummingbird buddies
I’m having this “peak experience”
and I’m—
not on vacation
no on meditation retreat
not on some far flung spiritual pilgrimage
but in my very own backyard—
literally
and I don’t reasonably expect
this flow state to continue at
this level every day
through the rest of my life
until I die
life is full of seasons
of natural ebbs and flows
I know
…
and so I’m sitting here scratching my head
and asking myself—
what is it then, specifically
what is starting to become super clear
in my 40th year?
what is the thing
or more probably,
combination of things
that helps me to access this feeling of
the oft-sought-after
oft-spoken-of
peak experience
more often
in my every day life
like the lil snappy ray of sunshine
that I am
and is me?
and how to access it more often?
like turning up a dial?
to 11?
just turn up the dial
and not turn oneself into
a spiritually-bypassy
out-of-touch
wellness guru
hawking green juice
and mainlining the latest supplement
and permanently OOO
from the office
and OOO
from life
on some spiritual retreat
so far from where
life
is
actually
happening
just someone who knows how
to throw up that 11 switch
and is so gifted at
helping others
do that for themselves
and for each other,
too
Venus is in her home sign
at last, you feel at home
in your in skin
in your own thoughts
and in your own backyard
the planets make a bunch of cute moves
the boys are fighting
and singing patriarchy’s
swan song
tides are changing
and you babe
find yourself
on the most righteous of precipices
of dropping into your ultimate groove
and riding your wave
your 11 wave
so let’s do this
let’s stay close together
in the coming weeks
and months
as we embark together
on this quest
the Universe beckons us into
we’re being asked
to put into words
in the ether
and on paper
to articulate
to put a finger upon
the un-put-finger-upon-able
the je ne sais quos
that thing you do
the words you speak
the thoughts you think
that really get you dropping into your groove
those things that help you
thrust right through
life’s portal
into your hummingbird era
can’t wait to dip my face
into life’s nectar pods
with YOU
we’ll drink deep
and flit around life’s garden
I’ll see you there
sending love and light from the un-articul-able-ultimate-groove,
ride your wave, babe
M
